have raw cake and eat it
I used to frequently be frequently asked, "Does he stay asleep when you put him down?", referring to my toddler asleep on me in a baby carrier. The truth is, I didn't know the answer, I didn’t try it out until he was about 18 months. In many cultures this would seem perfectly normal practice yet in our Western culture where independence is encouraged from an early age, the fact that my baby had only ever napped with me since birth - seemed rather strange to many people. Not only did it promote bonding, it also meant we could go anywhere we liked and he would sleep.
Why wear you baby? I found that by regularly wearing my first born, he actually felt lighter as time went on because my muscles built up. I did not have any back problems in my second pregnancy as I had in my first. I also was able to enjoy having him with me whatever I did - we were a unit. I could make lunch with him, hang up the washing with him, go for a walk with him rather than be separated from him in a buggy; he was an integral part of my daily activity. As a baby he rarely cried and was very calm. His language developed very early and I do not know if this was because we chatted so much with him in a sling and I think we had less than our fair share of toddler tantrums. If he was a bit fractious I could put him in the sling and he would calm down, but prevention was better than cure and the carrying often meant he was regularly content.
But with my first child I still only used more conventional baby carriers available from more mainstream places. However, my second son has never been in a buggy. This is something I have been able to do because I found some amazingly comfortable ways of wearing a baby that I had not discovered with my first.
Before he was born I had bought a stretchy wrap - it was amazing - I could breastfeed hands free, even in hospital the day after a caesarean birth. What is so wonderful about these stretchy wraps in that they are so 'poppable' - you can just pop baby in after a feed and they stay or fall asleep. They are so comfy for tiny ones, but if you start wrapping like this, like me you might well be a convert to wrapping and have to try out the amazing Woven Wraps. Although the various ways of tying might look daunting, actually with a bit of practice a few favourite wrapping styles can become as easy as getting dressed. I know that getting dressed can seem like climbing a mountain when you first have a new baby, but it gets quicker and easier and the rewards are so worthwhile, that soon you will be excited to try out new wrapping styles when you discover one.
BABYWEARING
For an older baby or toddler I like Mei Tais, Ring Slings or Soft Structured Carriers too, yet some people find wraps very comfortable and versatile. Things like cooking, vacuuming and playing with my older child were manageable with the toddler on my back and I enjoyed being close to him. When it all gets too much for a little one, calming, rocking or breastfeeding to sleep, Mei Tais are fantastic. My husband was also able to carry our older child in a Soft Structured Carrier until about age 4 (a Mei Tai would work too, but he prefers the ease of buckles), which was great if we are out for the day and he gets tired.
It was inspiring to find that in the city I live in I am certainly not alone as a babywearer. There is a monthly slingmeet where experienced, newbie and would be babywearers get together to share and compare their babywearing carriers and experiences. It is a breath of fresh air for to be in a room full of mums and little ones without a buggy in sight. People do not realise that there are so many other options out there for carrying babies as well as the conventional carriers that are easily available. The internet is essential to find more about the fantastic carriers that are around and I have found that there is a wealth of information to help you find the perfect one (or more) for you.
I think anyone who tried any of these types of carriers would never go near a conventional carrier again - and the buggy could easily gather dust. Popular carriers also have good resale value, especially the top names, so if you find you don't use it anymore you will probably find someone to sell it to or trade it with for something else. There is also the issue of the positioning of babies when carried to consider as some conventional carriers do not support the 'froggy leg position' required for correct spinal support. Experts will tell you never to wear your baby facing out with legs hanging down as it can be damaging to the spine, yet some carriers promote this position. In fact some claim that no forward facing positions are healthy and I have found my carriers will allow an awake baby to turn his head and look around at the world without obstruction.
If you have not tried your baby or toddler in a carrier you might be surprised how comfortable it can be and how less cumbersome it feels than pushing a buggy everywhere. There are even websites you can hire them from to try if there is not a Slingmeet near you.
To find your local Babywearing group where you can try out each others' baby carriers and chat to other Babywearing parents, register on the forum and find your local group and details of meeting times/dates at:
A huge international website with extensive reviews of baby carriers and a lively forum. It might be a bit overwhelming for a newbie but this is where the hard cord babywearing community share the latest gossip. The FSOT forum has used and nearly new baby carriers For Sale or Trade.
A smaller, more manageable UK forum with a similar format to the one above.
Join this UK Yahoo Group to buy or sell used or nearly new baby carriers. There is some overlap with the Rumplebums FSOT Forum as many people post items for sale on both.
UKBabywearingSWAP Yahoo Group
Useful Reading
Babywearing by Mary Blois
A Ride on Mother’s Back by Emery Bernhard
The Continuum Concept by Jean Liedloff
A Gift For New Mothers by deborah Jackson
